In our last two blog posts, we discussed the tall order of coming to believe in a power greater than ourselves as survivors of trauma. Our relationship to belief is complicated- for many of us, it takes years upon years to even reconcile with the ability to believe that what happened to us even happened to us. Trauma is like that- complicated to the point of disbelief. Often, the traumas we have experienced are so inconceivable that our brain actually has difficulty comprehending the full truth of them. In a way, the brain’s dysfunction in fully processing the entire brunt of trauma is both a gift and a survival mechanism. Perhaps that is why those who have lived through trauma in their lives have such difficulty “coming to believe” in a power greater than themselves. Creating that kind of trust in an outside power is hard to do when trauma itself seems like an outside power which cannot be trusted.
What we learn in recovery is that trust can be built overtime. We can come to trust our program, our treatment team, our therapist, our support system, and our peers in recovery. We see that people can have greater power than we can until we find power within ourselves. We undergo this transformation because we are willing to allow ourselves to believe these changes are possible. Defining and embracing a power greater than ourselves is another great change we undergo in our recovery journey. If we can’t find the sheer ability to believe, we can, most certainly, find the willingness to believe. If we can’t find the willingness to believe, we can try an old twelve-step recovery trick: finding the willingness to be willing to believe.
Prayer might be something that works for some of us or we might call them intentions, speaking to the Universe, manifesting, or visualizing. Essentially each of these practices is one in the same. Asking ourselves to believe can be too much. Asking ourselves to be willing to believe can even be too much. Asking ourselves to find the willingness to be willing to believe could be just the baby step we need.
You can walk through your trauma. The Guest House Ocala offers residential treatment programming for trauma, addictions, and related mental health issues. Call us today for information on our customized programs and availability: 1-855-483-7800