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How We Sabotage Our Sobriety with Relationships

Many of us recovering from addiction tend to sabotage our sobriety in all kinds of ways, many of which we often aren’t conscious of. We’re working against ourselves and undermining our progress without being aware that we’re doing so. We’re striving for sobriety but holding ourselves back. We can feel like we’re taking two steps forward only to then take ten back. Some of the ways we self-sabotage seemingly have nothing to do with our addictions, with our use of our addictive substances and behaviors. They might seem entirely unrelated to our drugs of choice, but they can impact our recovery just as negatively as if we had relapsed.


One of the major ways we sabotage our sobriety is in our choice of relationships. Whether with family members, partners or friends, many of us are in unhealthy relationships that are full of turmoil and conflict. We grow accustomed to living with frequent misunderstanding, tension, and discord in our closest relationships. We feel unheard, unseen, unloved and unworthy. We feel our relationships belittle and demean us. We use our unhealthy relationships as evidence of our inadequacy, and when they make us feel bad about ourselves, we believe ourselves to be unworthy. When people treat us in harmful ways, we believe that to be the treatment we deserve. Allowing ourselves to stay in these kinds of relationships often means we’re abandoning ourselves, our needs and our emotions. We’re not nurturing or caring for ourselves. When our relationships are with other addicts, we can often find ourselves being triggered, pressured and coerced to use our drug of choice again. We can find being around these other people quite stressful, and seeing them use their drug of choice in front of us can be a source of temptation and tremendous anxiety.

Committing to Ourselves

When we aren’t yet conscious of this idea of self-sabotage, and when we haven’t yet assessed the health of our relationships, we often are sabotaging our recovery directly and in extreme ways with these particular relationships. We’re undermining our mental health. We’re chipping away at our sense of self-worth. We’re setting ourselves up for relapse. We want to get to the point in our recovery where we love ourselves so much and are so committed to ourselves and our sobriety, that no relationship can make us waver in that commitment. We want to bolster our chances of success in recovery by choosing relationships that support our sobriety, that help us feel wonderful about ourselves, and that show us nothing but love and encouragement.

At The Guest House Ocala, we have personal recovery experience

and over 12 years in the recovery industry.

We have helped countless people recover, and we’re here to help you too.

Call 855-483-7800 today for more information.

3230 Northeast 55th Avenue Silver Springs, FL 34488