When it comes to dealing with our pasts, many of us still feel haunted by our memories and so consumed with the past that we feel it controls us and negatively impacts our lives. We feel as though we can’t move forward. We can’t let go of the past or make peace with it. We feel as though we’re making decisions we might not make if we weren’t still being driven by our pasts. We feel we wouldn’t still be caught in the self-destructive patterns and self-hating cycles that were formed by the traumas of our past. Sometimes we ask ourselves if we should reflect on the past in order to heal it, or if we should simply let it go.
Part of the answer lies in how we’re going about reflecting on the past. If we’re dredging up old memories in order to hold grudges or stay stuck in our anger, bitterness and resentment, reflection in this way might be holding us back. If we’re holding onto shame and guilt, if we’re feeling unable to forgive the past and come to terms with it, if we’re unable to make peace with the things that have happened to us and the things we’ve done, we won’t be able to move into the future in a positive, affirming, uplifting way. We will continue to remain stuck, letting our pasts continue to destroy us. If, on the other hand, we’re reflecting on the past in order to uncover lessons for ourselves, and if we’re using them to help motivate ourselves and push us forward, if we’re using self-reflection to improve upon ourselves and commit to our personal development, reflection is a powerful tool in our healing. It all depends on how we’re going about reflecting. Are we beating ourselves up? Are we clinging to the grudges we’re holding against other people? Are we giving more energy to mourning the past than manifesting the future we want for ourselves?
Grief is a natural part of life, and it’s a step in the healing journey we can’t just skip over, as much we might like to avoid the pain and heartache of it. Many of us find it impossible to just let go of the past and everything we’ve been through. It is possible, though, to reflect on the past in such a way that we’re empowered by our reflection rather than hindered by it. We can use our past experiences to inform our growth, our learning and our evolution. When we’ve fully come to terms with the past, we’re better able to detach from it in healthy ways and feel as though we’re letting go of our pain in order to move forward.
At The Guest House Ocala, we have personal recovery experience and over 12 years in the recovery industry. We have helped countless people recover, and we’re here to help you too. Call 855-483-7800 today for more information.