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Why Can't My Loved One Stay Sober

Time and again, your loved one continues to forsake your relationship because they are addicted to drugs and alcohol. You want nothing more than for them to become sober. You want them to have a fulfilling life, and their inability to stay sober leaves you baffled, extremely sad, and possibly angry. You are unsure why they are choosing to get drunk and use drugs over maintaining any accountability for anything.

A person’s inability to get sober cannot be easily explained to someone who has not suffered from addiction. Why would they let their drinking and using get so bad in light of the consequences they are facing? Why will they not stop, knowing they are hurting others? You probably have a million of these questions and no answers at all.

The Why

Those who are prone to addiction are bodily and mentally different from people who can drink regularly. Once they have one drink or one hit off a drug, a phenomenon of craving kicks in that gives them a one-track mind. They will go to any lengths to stay drunk or high, so they do not have to come down. Your loved one does not intentionally mean to do anything to you. After excessive use, they cannot differentiate right from wrong. The effects produced by drugs and alcohol create an obsession of the mind that tells them they have not had enough, even if they are slurring or falling down. To keep up with this obsession, they will keep trying to fill the void with something that numbs them. Even if they seemingly have a perfect life, they are most likely suffering from trauma or abuse that may not have been disclosed to you.

The How

Your loved one may not want to get help for addiction, but you can get help for yourself. The best way to combat drugs and alcohol is to become knowledgeable about addiction, enabling, and codependency, all of which tend to happen concurrently. You will be acquiring information for your own edification. You will also be sending your loved one a message that you are receiving help because you believe in them and want to support their recovery.

You may never fully understand why your loved one cannot get sober. Make sure to take care of yourself, learn how to set boundaries, and become prepared to encourage your loved one’s recovery when they are ready to get sober.

At The Guest House Ocala, our recovery programs include many experiential modalities, including traditional therapy, conscious connected breathwork, equine therapy, somatic experiencing, art in healing, grief therapy, mindfulness, and other forms of treatment.
Call 855-372-1079 today for more information.