incredible-marketing Arrow

Why Do We Resent Sobriety?

What We Fear We’re Losing

As we’re struggling with our addictions, we will face certain impediments to our recovery. For many of us, resentment towards sobriety itself is one of the greatest obstacles we face. We resent sobriety for what we feel it represents. For addicted people, sobriety means having to give up things we enjoy. Sobriety feels limiting and restrictive, and we’re terrified of becoming someone with whom we’re uncomfortable and unfamiliar. We equate being sober with losing our freedom. Without substances, we’ll no longer have fun, relax, or party. We assume we’ll be missing out on celebrations and social gatherings. People won’t like us anymore because our sober selves are boring and antisocial. We also resent sobriety because it means we have to confront our feelings without having anything to numb them for us. We’re afraid of how painful our difficult emotions might be. We’ve been hiding from our sadness, fear, and anger for so long. Facing them after all these years seems to be a Herculean endeavor. In short, we come to resent sobriety because we associate it with emotional distress and the inability to self-medicate.

What We Choose to Remember

When we feel this resentment toward sobriety and recovery, we’re practicing something called “selective memory.” We suddenly forget all the inner conflict, turmoil, and relationship issues that have accompanied our addictions. We choose to ignore the agony of our addictions in favor of good memories. All we can remember are the good times while the bad times become foggy and unclear. In this light, we see that sobriety is robbing us of our joy and playfulness. Our carefree days have been replaced by dusty, boring sobriety. Obviously, this perspective is dangerous, but selective memory is a key feature of addiction – we all experience it at times. The key is to persevere even when sobriety feels like a prison. These feelings are only illusions created by our addiction.

 Discovering What Sobriety Can Offer Us

Healing this resentment, and recovering from our addictions, means giving sobriety a chance. We want to give it time to see how it’s actually going to turn out, rather than operating based on assumptions. When we’re sober, we’re able to give more time and energy to our creative pursuits and passions. Sobriety means more quality time with friends and family. We get to find new ways of having fun and celebrating life. With patience, we’re able to reclaim the lives we lost, set goals for ourselves, and redefine who we want to be. Sobriety can be the greatest gift we give ourselves, but only if we allow ourselves the time to heal. If we can shed our preconceived notions of a sober life, we can discover an incredible new life for ourselves. 

Sobriety doesn’t have to be as grim as we make it out to be. In fact, millions of sober people will readily testify to the incredible opportunities afforded to them through the process of recovery. Are you ready to take the first step on your journey to recovery? Call The Guest House today! 855-483-7800.