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In one of our recent blog posts, we discussed the truth about a common misconception among those who have experienced abuse in their lives. Abuse is never the fault of someone being abused. Abuse is never justified. Abuse is never deserved. Abuse is a choice on the part of the abuser. Staying in a relationship of any kind with someone who has abused you is also a choice. Recognizing that the choice is yours as to whether you want to stay in contact with someone who has abused you takes time, treatment, therapy, and recovery.

Abuse is psychological warfare enacted by one person upon the mind, heart, body, and spirit of another. Through complex and harmful mental confusion, an abuser can convince the person they are abusing of many things. Frequently, abusers instill in their victims that their victims cannot live without them. When there is love involved, which there often is, someone who is the victim of abuse will feel spiritually torn. They know that abuse is wrong. They know that the person who is abusing them may never change. They know the abuse may never stop. Yet they believe two things. First, they believe with a hope against hope, that the abuser will change and the abuse will stop. Second, they may believe that their abuser is right: there is no living without them.

You do not have to stay in relationship with your abuser. When therapists and trauma treatment specialists tell this to their clients, their clients are often in disbelief. But she’s my mother. But he’s my boyfriend. But they’re a friend of the family. But its my boss. The rationalizations are an endless wellspring, sourced from years of trauma on the psyche. You never choose for abuse to happen to you, though you may be allowing abuse to happen to you for unconscious reasons yet to be discovered. You can choose to walk away from someone who abuses you. You can choose to walk away from someone who hurts you. You can choose to recover your life from the trauma you have walked through. You do not have to stay in a situation where you are repeatedly abused, traumatized, or exposed to the trauma of abuse.

Leaving relationships with an abuser behind is incredibly difficult to do. There is so much love to give, so much forgiveness to be had, so much hope that one day they will be different. One day they will act differently. One day, all the endured abuse will be worth the miraculous change.

There is never a guarantee that an abuser will change their ways. You, however, can change your life today. Recovery from the trauma of abuse takes careful treatment by trauma experts through a treatment program selectively curated to meet the specific needs of your experiences. Everyone has a story. Everyone deserves to heal, including you. At The Guest House Ocala, we welcome all of our guests with open arms, open hearts, and the promise of a better tomorrow. For information on our concierge residential treatment programs, call us today: 1-855-483-7800