The relationships we build over the course of our lives have the capacity to help strengthen and support us or to weaken and destroy us. They can contribute either to our healing or to exacerbated suffering. As addicts, we often struggle with relationship-building, partly because we’re in a relationship with others also coping with addictionRead More
Over the years we’ve grown dependent on our drugs of choice to help us cope with the relationship issues in our lives. We’ve turned to addictive substances and behaviors to numb the most difficult thoughts and feelings associated with the painful relationship problems we’re experiencing. As we’re working to recover, we realize that not onlyRead More
When we’re in recovery, we often find we have to be extra mindful of things that might cause us to relapse. Certain situations, events, thoughts, feelings, and memories can be particularly troublesome, worrisome, burdensome and bothersome for us. They might be things we’re especially sensitive to, things that bring up additional stress, and things thatRead More
When in recovery, we’d like to think we’re out of the woods so to speak, that we’ve done enough work to be able to enjoy peace, calm and balance, especially in our relationships. Unfortunately, the people in our lives and new people we meet haven’t necessarily done as much work on their own recovery toRead More
For many of us living with addiction and mental illness, it is not our thoughts and feelings causing us the most pain but rather our relationship to them that ultimately hurts us the most. We have a relationship with our inner selves that is built on fear and resistance. We’re afraid of feeling our sadnessRead More
We sometimes think of our recovery as a one-person job, as work we have to do on our own, in isolation. While it’s true we have to take ownership of and responsibility for our recovery and do the work for ourselves, we can find immense support and comfort in our relationships, particularly those with peopleRead More
As we come to learn through our own struggles with addiction, sometimes people grappling with addiction just aren’t ready to do the work needed to recover. We might find that we need to separate ourselves from loved ones in order to protect ourselves, both energetically and emotionally, and from danger and harm. Our loved onesRead More
When we experience relationships that are codependent in nature and that function like addictions, there are often some very difficult underlying issues going on that we haven’t fully healed from. We have subconscious fears and limiting beliefs that affect our ability to be alone, to be independent, and to feel we’re enough on our own.Read More
Many of us struggling with addiction and mental health issues find ourselves in toxic, unhealthy and even abusive relationships. We attract these relationships into our lives because of our own feelings of unworthiness, our own self-rejection and insecurity. We don’t believe we deserve partners who value us and treat us well. We don’t believe weRead More
When we are struggling with addiction and mental illness, many of us tend to choose relationships that are toxic, unhealthy and destructive. We choose partners who are bad for us, who devalue and demean us, and who contribute to our feelings of worthlessness. We tend to attract and choose partners who themselves are struggling withRead More