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How To Be The Best Parent To Yourself: Part Four

This is part four in our series on how to be the best parent to yourself and love your inner child. Each of us has an inner child who may not have had their basic needs met in the way they really needed. Our inner children are also smart, creative, imaginative, and curious, full of curiosities, dreams, ideas, wishes, and desires. Acting like the grown up in our lives we never had the chance to have, or perhaps we did have and had to suffer the loss of at some point, we take all of this incredible wisdom offered to us by our inner child and put it into practice.

Part three of our series encouraged us to work with our trauma therapist to make lists of our childhood needs as well as our childhood desires. Taking a look at the information our inner child has given us, our trauma recovery and growing up process can include meeting those needs and granting those desires in different ways.

We have to remember that trauma can start in the womb and impacts our neurological development from our earliest stages of life. Thought their young years, our inner children learn the lessons our parents were teaching them, which can include many of the painful sentiments of our trauma. Sometimes, our inner child’s need will be based in anger or their desire will be founded in destruction. Being the wise, discerning, unconditionally loving parent to ourselves, we see through this emotional pain and love our inner child even more deeply.

Incorporate Your Needs Into Your Daily Life

Many adults in trauma recovery, substance abuse recovery, or any other kind of recovery learn about the four warning signs of HALT: hungry, angry, lonely, and tired. Our needs as both children and grown up are very simple. We need to be fed, we need to regulate our emotions, we need to interact with other people, and we need to rest. All of these needs help us feel the love and support which are critical to our daily function. When our inner child really needs an apple juice, we go to the store and get one. When our inner child really needs to cry, we allow ourselves to. When our inner child really needs to be reaffirmed and validated, we offer them the sweet words they need to hear.

Plan Your Desires Out As Rewards

We cannot give our inner child all of the desires of their heart all of the time. Part of learning how to be the best parent to ourselves is learning how to set healthy, loving, flexible boundaries. As grownups, we have jobs and responsibilities which we must uphold as part of our grown up self care. In between, however, we can visit the desires of our childhood. Being a grown up with a paycheck has its perks! We can buy ourselves the treats, toys, and experiences we always wanted. More importantly, we can place our inner child first, which is really placing ourselves. Being put first with unconditional love is the greatest desire of any child.

Everyone’s story starts before treatment. Everyone’s story changes the minute they arrive to treatment. The Guest House Ocala offers residential programming for trauma, addictions, and related mental health issues, customized to meet your unique needs. Call us today for information on life at the estate: 1-855-483-7800