Many of us struggling with addiction and mental health issues find ourselves in toxic, unhealthy and even abusive relationships. We attract these relationships into our lives because of our own feelings of unworthiness, our own self-rejection and insecurity. We don’t believe we deserve partners who value us and treat us well. We don’t believe we deserve to be happy. Consciously we want healthy relationships in which we feel safe, loved and nurtured, but subconsciously we’re still caught in cycles of self-sabotage, where we’re actively ruining our own chances of being happy and healthy. One of the most important elements of healing ourselves is making the conscious choice to let go of our unhealthy relationships.
This important choice comes down to recognizing our self-worth and deciding that we can no longer give anyone else, or anything else, the power to bring us down. We decide that our inner peace, our sanity and our serenity are most important to us, and no relationship in our lives, whether it’s with a platonic friend, a romantic partner or a family member, is worth sacrificing that anymore. We finally understand that everything hinges on our own sense of peace, our well-being and stability. If we aren’t grounded and at peace within ourselves, we will only continue the patterns of self-destructiveness, addiction and mental, emotional unwellness that have been hurting us for so long. We decide that we want to love ourselves and be good to ourselves, and we’ll no longer give time or energy to people who don’t help us to uphold these critical values of self-love, self-respect and self-worth.
Letting go of these relationships is far from easy. We’ve grown accustomed to relationship patterns of codependence, neediness and attachment. We’ve become self-harming. We’ve grown used to enabling each other and allowing the relationship to contribute to our addictive patterns. Along with feeling like we need our drugs of choice, we feel like we need these people. We feel like we can’t live without them. We believe we’re not good enough without them. We feel lost, empty and incomplete without them. Making the choice to leave these relationships behind means simultaneously shedding these limiting beliefs and working to build up our sense of self-worth. It means actively, consciously choosing our well-being, in every action we take and every decision we make. It means finding healthier ways of coping with our loneliness, fear and temptation, with things like meditation, exercise, writing and other forms of creative expression. When we finally believe we deserve to be happy, we stop settling for anything less, and we empower ourselves to really be able to recover from our addictions and other unhealthy, self-destructive patterns.
The caring, compassionate staff of The Guest House is here to support you as you start your journey to recovery and healing. Call 855-483-7800 today for more information.