As the loved ones of addicts, our instincts are often to keep them close to us so that we can watch over them and do our best to ensure they’re okay. We want them to know they are loved and cared for. We want to show them our unconditional support. We want to protect them. It’s so hard to see them endanger themselves and others, often for years at a time. It hurts to watch them self-destructing and causing themselves pain. We can feel as though there’s nothing we can do to stop them from hurting themselves, there’s nothing we can do to put a stop to their recurring cycles of addiction. We often don’t realize this at the time, but we’re suffering too because of our loved ones’ experiences with addiction. Sometimes for our peace of mind, for our mental and emotional well-being, we find that we have to take some time away and prioritize our healing. Should we distance ourselves from the addicts in our lives?
Our Feelings of Protectiveness & Responsibility
There are no right or wrong answers when it comes to our close personal relationships. There isn’t necessarily anything we should or shouldn’t do, but there are some things we can take into consideration. When we’re giving so much of our time and energy to another person, we’re often sacrificing ourselves and our needs. We’re taking more responsibility for their recovery than they are, and we’re shirking our responsibility to ourselves. There is only so much we can do to protect them, though. We can’t possibly watch over them day and night. We can’t always be there to keep them out of trouble. At some point, we have to realize that we’re trying too hard to be protective of others, while not being similarly protective of ourselves.
Our Decision to Prioritize Ourselves
We might decide to create distance for ourselves when we’re being impacted negatively, mentally, emotionally or physically. We might find that our loved ones’ addictions are causing them to be unkind or abusive towards us. We might feel that our health or safety is now at risk. When we do decide to take some distance, either for a short time or indefinitely, we often feel a great deal of guilt around our decision. We have to remember that we can’t be there for anyone else if we’re not first and foremost there for ourselves. We can’t repair anyone else’s lives but our own, and as much as we love other people, our priority has to be ourselves. We can’t be the source of support we want to be for other people when our peace of mind is being depleted. We’re not helping them recover if we’re being hurt in the process.
The Guest House is a welcoming and supportive recovery home where you will be met with open arms, wherever you are on your journey, without judgment or expectation.
Call 855-483-7800 today for more information.
theguesthouseocala.com
3230 Northeast 55th Avenue Silver Springs, FL 34488