When we’ve relapsed, we’re hit with all kinds of painful emotions that are so hard to live with, that we have a hard time accepting, and that can continue to fuel our addictive patterns because we’re tempted to use our drugs of choice to escape them. We feel disappointed in ourselves. We feel heartbroken. We feel defeated. We feel devastated to have let ourselves and our loved ones down, yet again. These painful feelings drive us to want to use more, to avoid having to feel them, and we fall into recurring patterns of relapsing that we feel we can’t extricate ourselves from. When we do finally manage to get sober and stay sober, it is often because we have grown tired of these endlessly painful cycles.
Starting From Square One
When we relapse, we have to start from square one and build ourselves up, all over again. Many of us do a day count where we consistently count our sober days, and when we relapse, we have to start our count from zero. We feel as though all of the hard work we’ve done, all the changes we’ve implemented, all the progress we’ve made goes right out the window. This can be especially frustrating and demoralizing. Many of us get to the point where we don’t want to have to start all over again. We don’t want to throw away all the great things we’ve accomplished. We don’t want to have to make that call to our sponsor or confess our relapse to our therapist. We don’t want to have to see that all too familiar look in our family members’ eyes, that look of disappointment but also of expectation. They’re sad to hear we’ve relapsed, but they’re often not surprised. We’ve all been through this so many times before.
Defining Moments
Even though our addictions can make us feel powerless, and even though we can come to believe that we have no control over them and no choice in the matter, sometimes we have a moment where we are just so frustrated and exhausted at the thought of having to start over again that we stop ourselves from relapsing. This can be the defining moment where we choose not to pick up our drug of choice again after working so hard to put it down. We’ve become totally fed up with having to start all over again, and this can motivate us to keep going, to keep fighting to stay sober, to continue to make healthier choices for ourselves.
The Guest House is a welcoming and supportive recovery home where you will be met with compassion, wherever you are on your journey, without judgment or expectation.
Call 855-483-7800 today for more information.
theguesthouseocala.com
3230 Northeast 55th Avenue Silver Springs, FL 34488