There are countless different ways in which we use our addictions to try and help ourselves cope. Sometimes what we’re most seeking when we turn to our alcohol and/or other drugs of choice is a feeling of numbness, a sense of nothingness, an emptiness as a way of coping because our mental and emotional pain has been so severe, for so long. We want to forget. We want to escape. We want to be distracted from our thoughts and feelings. We want relief and release from the debilitating pain of our addictions and mental health issues. We seek numbness because it is the exact opposite of the paralyzing, heavy, burdensome weight of our pain.
We can’t always put our emotional reasons for our addictions into words. We can’t articulate or verbalize exactly why we use, or why we’ve developed the coping mechanisms we have, or why we’ve become so dependent upon our particular drugs of choice. Sometimes all we know is that the pain feels too unbearable, too colossal, so we use to forget and to zone out. We use to make ourselves feel better. We want the high to take us away from our pain, to numb the ache of our broken hearts, our bitterness, our shame, and regret. We feel so down on ourselves, so low, so disappointed in how our lives have turned out that we would rather feel nothing than have to feel the pain insurmountable we’re experiencing.
Part of recovery is learning how to handle our emotions without needing to numb ourselves to them, distract ourselves from them or try to escape them. A huge part of transforming our addictive patterns is making the conscious choice to face our pain rather than running from it. We know we’ve made great strides in our healing when it feels better to us to really feel our emotions, the whole broad spectrum of them, even the full weight of them, instead of the emptiness of numbness. We’ve done a lot of healing when we can face our painful memories head-on rather than trying to forget them. We’ve done a lot of great recovery work when numbing ourselves and zoning out are no longer appealing to us, when we would rather face ourselves as we are and confront things as they are, including the most difficult things in our lives and the most complex elements of ourselves, rather than avoiding, denying and suppressing them.
At The Guest House Ocala, we have personal recovery experience and over 12 years in the recovery industry. We have helped countless people recover, and we’re here to help you too. Call 855-483-7800 today for more information.