Our work in recovery involves having to do some of the hardest things we’ll ever have to do, challenges we never thought we could rise to because they seemed too painful and too difficult. One of these challenges is saying goodbye to loved ones who, for whatever reason, are contributing to our unhealthiness and infringing upon our well-being. Many of us have experienced this – we have a friend, partner, family member or ex that brings us considerable stress, that makes us feel bad about ourselves and puts us down, or that threatens our sobriety in one way or another. They might pressure us to drink or use, knowing full well we’re in recovery. They might project their issues onto us, not taking responsibility for their own recovery. They might serve as painful reminders of wounds we have yet to heal, causing us continued pain over the years. When we realize that these people are causing us more harm than good and that they are weakening our ability to stay sober, we often have to make the very difficult, very emotional decision to say goodbye.
Allow Yourself to Grieve
Leaving important relationships behind can be gut-wrenching, heartbreaking and devastating to say the least. We’re saying goodbye to people who have meant a lot to us over the years. We might have to undergo a grieving process where we allow ourselves to mourn the relationship and the love we shared. We make this important choice to say goodbye because our recovery teaches us the importance of caring for ourselves and making sure our needs are met. We learn how crucial it is to prioritize our mental and emotional health. We see how interconnected our emotions are with our sobriety. The more stressed, anxious, depressed and unhappy we are because of our relationships, the more conflict and turmoil we’re dealing with, the more likely we are to use our drugs of choice to escape and self-medicate. Relationships that make us happy, that are built on peace, trust, and respect, are the relationships that support our sobriety and that helps us to stay aligned with our sobriety and motivated to get well. These are the relationships we want to prioritize and give our time and energy to.
We realize that we can no longer risk the pain that unhealthy relationships bring us. We can’t risk how much they negatively impact our sobriety and threaten to derail all the hard work we’ve been doing. We learn how important it is to make sure our emotional needs are being met at all times and in all of our relationships, and we discover that any relationships that endanger our health and threaten our sobriety are ones we can’t risk holding onto.
The Guest House is a welcoming and supportive recovery home where you will be met with open arms, wherever where you are on your journey, without judgment or expectation. Call 855-483-7800 today for more information.