As we’re working to discover more about our addictions, many of us find that the root cause is our subconscious feelings of self-hatred. We’re often unconscious of just how self-hating we’ve become over the years, even as we’re aware of a great deal of emotional pain. We suffer, but we don’t know that our damagedRead More
Recovering from our addictions is much more than shedding our dependence on our drug of choice. A successful recovery also entails learning how to care for ourselves. We need to assess what our needs are and make sure we’re meeting them. Many of us have been neglecting ourselves and our needs for quite some time.Read More
The Self-Hate at the Root of Our Problems When we develop certain addictive patterns, it is because we are trying to escape parts of ourselves. Our self-rejection can manifest in all kinds of destructive ways, including our addictions, but frequently going much further. Consider the ways we self-sabotage in our daily lives, how we holdRead More
Some of the most important recovery work involves figuring out the reasons for the intense emotional challenges we’re facing. A lot of times, we’re suffering without knowing why. We feel a great deal of fear, but we’re often unaware that it’s fear we’re experiencing. Fear can masquerade as anger, defensive, and a host of otherRead More
We Develop Defense Mechanisms Our addictions can cause us to develop some very problematic defense mechanisms. These mechanisms are supposed to help us cope with problems and feel better. Unfortunately, addiction turns these natural psychological defenses against us. As addicts, we tend to downplay what we’re going through. Instead of opening up, we get defensive.Read More
When in recovery, we can sometimes find ourselves feeling uninspired and unfulfilled. Sometimes this is the case because we have been working so hard on our recovery programs and focusing on the work we have to do to maintain our sobriety. In that context, our other interests get neglected. Sometimes it’s because our addictions haveRead More
We often hear that addiction is a lifelong illness that we will always have to manage. Some of us feel fully recovered but continue to work diligently to prevent ourselves from relapsing. Others feel completely cured of their addictions. The experience of addiction recovery is unique to each of us. Every addicted person has differentRead More
We Aren’t Thinking Straight Our addictions are detrimental and destructive forces in our lives for so many different reasons. One of the biggest reasons is the loss of self-control we experience when we’re under the influence of our drugs of choice. Substances cloud our judgment, alter our perception, and destroy our common sense. We feelRead More
In early recovery, we need to determine what triggers us to use our drug of choice. Many of us find that interpersonal conflicts are the most powerful triggers in our lives. Conflicts with our loved ones can be especially impactful. When we have an argument or misunderstanding, we’re accustomed to getting high to forget theRead More
How Disconnected We’ve Become As we’re working to recover, we learn a lot of things about our addictions that might seem paradoxical. For instance, they can be both a way to feel more like ourselves and a driving force in our self-alienation. We can get caught in cycles of feeling the push and pull ofRead More